I'm Finished!

And that's all I'm going to say about that. I'm patiently waiting for Jonathan to read the last few pages so we can discuss. I can't believe I just read the very last book!

Larry the Attack, Punk Ass, Butthole Camel

As many of you know our family is currently residing in the biggest house ever playing parents to three teenage children and getting well paid for it. I'll take some pics soon. Last night Mere and Ryan came over to eat and celebrate Rabbit. After supper we decided to crank the 4 wheeler and the mule (kind of like a rugged golf cart) and drove down to the barn. This family has several horses and a pet camel. Yes, you heard it right a camel named Larry. Well Larry is getting big (duh) and when I was feeding him treats and patting him he put his knee up on the edge of his stall like he was going to climb out. Jonathan decides it would be a good idea to let Larry out into the rodeo arena to frolic. That indeed was what Larry did. He ran around long legs flying and bucked and galloped like there was no tomorrow. It really was funny. Jonathan decided to get in on the action and play with him. By this time we were all out in the arena me, Mere, Laine, Bowen and Jonathan. That's when Larry lost it. He went over to Mere and leaned on her until she had to climb the fence with Bowen in her arms. Then Jonathan came over and Larry started to bounce around more he knocked Laine down then Jonathan who had Bowen in his arms. He then tried to hump Jonathan. That's when I had to bust a move and get over to Laine so Jonathan could get up off the ground. I got Laine, skirted the fence and proceeded to tell Larry "no, bad camel" like he was a dog or something. Yikes. Laine and Bowen were scared to death. Mere was too, she was a little worried that Larry would knock her down and scare Rabbit. All in all, everyone was fine. Jonathan scratched his knee from the attempted humping and Larry is probably a little sore from Jonathan beating him away from the kids. What an adventure, thus Larry's new name.

Laine and Bowen weigh in

This ranks in the top 5 most exciting weeks of my life! I mean I get to find out if I'm going to be the aunt to a boy or a girl and the 7th Harry Potter book comes out, I'm dying here. We have been quizzing Laine and Bowen on whether the think Mere and Ryan are having a girl or a boy. Their answers never waver so I've documented their choices in pictures:

One of them will be right, and I think the winner gets to name the baby.

Laine name for Mere's baby: Ruby

Bowen's name for Mere's baby: Rabbit

I hope Laine wins.

What kind of hair: blonde and straight

What happens when you have a baby: go to the hospital, take the baby out of your tummy, and bottom ummmm. vagina.

What will Mere do with the baby: milk the baby, feed it baby food.

what will the baby act like: nice, suck it's thumb

First things first...L and R what do you think?

1. Who was your first prom date?Drew Perkins, my first love
2. Who was your first roommate?Tiffany Touchstone
3. What was your first alcoholic drink?Margarita but I don't remember how old I was
4. What was your first job?Sunfish, I was a lifeguard and swim teacher
5. What was your first car?1979 red Toyota pick up truck
6. Who was the first person that texted you yesterday?I really don't text that often!
7. Who is the first person you thought of this morning?Laine and Bowen, they are gone and I miss them!
8. Who was your first grade teacher?Mrs. Bench, you can guess what her nickname was!
9. Where did you go on your first ride on an airplane?I think to Colorado or maybe New Jersey, not sure!
10. When you snuck out of your house for the first time, who was with you?I never snuck out, I was too scared...wait a minute, what am I saying, I really just never wanted to!
11. Who was your first best friend and are you still friends with them?Mark Doty, we're not friends but I still see him every once in a while. I LOVED him!
12. Where was your first sleep over?I have no idea, but Mark and I had a few sleepovers.
13. Who was the first person you talked to this morning?Jonathan
14. Whose wedding were you in the first time? I'm not sure if I was in one when I was little, Mom?
15. What is the first thing you do in the morning?take my medicine
16. What was the first concert you ever went to? Oak Ridge Boys
17. First tattoo or piercing?Piercing in the ears - 6, second hole at 12, first tattoo 30,
18. First foreign country you went to?Mexico
19. First crush? Mike Brekenridge
20. When was your first detention?6th grade English, I was talking
21. What was the first state you lived in?Texas
22. Who was your first kiss with?Josh, he turned out gay, how'd ya like that!
23. Who was the first person to break your heart? Drew
24. Do you still think about that person?Yes.

Here is what my house looks like...AHHHHHHH

The kids are at my in-laws and Jonathan and I are tackling two big project in the mean time. He's building a deck and I'm painting the kitchen cabinets. The kids are coming home tomorrow and we need to get finished and clean up before they get home. Wish us luck!

My Morning Routine

Are you like me? Do you have a specific order to your grooming? Well, I have a well-oiled one that allows me to get ready in less than 30 minutes. Here it is! This is only if I'm getting ready to go somewhere, in the summer and on weekends it sometimes is different, like no make-up or something.

Get in shower: wash hair, condition hair, wash body, then face. Shave my legs if needed. Get out.

Dry off, put towel on my head. Put lotion on my legs then moisturizer on my face. Rinse hands. Take towel off put styling products in. Blow-dry hair.

Rinse hands. Put on make-up in this order: foundation, blush, curl eyelashes, mascara, eyeliner, eyeshadow, powder.

Put finishing product on my hair, brush my teeth, go get dressed.

Yes, I do get ready sans clothes! It's really hot in my bathroom, it doesn't have ventilation, so clothes go on after when I've cooled off. Unless it's winter, then I'm cold so I wear a terry robe while getting ready.

So, how do you get ready in the morning?


I promise to post some pictures soon!

My trip to the Mall

I'm so optimistic. Probably to a fault, I think that's why when things don't go my way I'm really disappointed. So I had a plan in mind since the weather was kind of yuck, hey!, we can go to the mall! Great plan. I can return a shirt that made Bowen cry because the arms were so tight and look for a little Anniversary present for Jonathan, let the kids play, get a snack go home and have rest time. Woo hoo! So off we go. We get the shirt returned and then go to the Disney store (yeah I know) and it was crazy because of some semi-annual sale. I pried my children away from the stimulation fest and then get sidetracked at Lady Foot Locker trying on converse. So we hit Macy's and I find some bath sheets that feel SO lovely and decide I'd get Jonathan and I one for the above mentioned gift. Oooh white towels...my shopping daze is suddenly interrupted by Bowen shrieking. I glance over thinking it's just normal sibling stuff, alas, it was not, Bowen's face is covered in blood. I race over, careful to set the white towels out of the bleeding radius to examine from what body part the blood is flowing. I inquire what happened and I'm getting nada from Laine which means it was her fault. He then begins blowing raspberries I guess because it hurts, so that sends spatters of blood flying everywhere. I'm guessing it was his lip, I never really could tell. I wiped and dabbed and it kept coming, we went to the bathroom to wash up and really, what is bleeding etiquette in a public place? I felt weird putting bio hazard stuff in the trash but what else could I do? So we leave the mall looking like we'd been in battle, blood all over my shirt, Bowen's clothes, the stroller. Again being optimistic, we're going to try again after supper and see if we can avoid anymore blood. Man, I'm ready for Jonathan to be home!

You too can have beautiful skin like me!

So I've been looking for a new moisturizer for my oily but maturing skin. I was at the mall the other night and I decided to see what Clinique had to offer. They have a new moisturizing gel for oily skin, aha!, just what I need. I asked the sales lady and she gave me a tube sample and some three step samples as well. So I skipped home to try it. I used the three step samples first and saw the gel is yellow like the lotion. All went well and the next night I broke out the tube she gave me. "Hmmm" I thought "this is clear not yellow". I tried it anyway, it felt and smelled the same, so on it went. I slept. I woke up. I tried it again, still clear. I'll take care of this I thought and I shook it REALLY hard to mix it up so it would be yellow. Still clear. Oh Well. On it went. So it's a day and a half later and as I'm putting on the clear gel for the fourth time I happen to glance at the tube. It. was. soap. Yes, I had slept in soap, put my make-up over soap, and declared what a great job soap was doing at moisturizing my skin without making it shiny. Luckily, I have suffered no repercussions (ie zits). When did I get so dumb? Or maybe the Clinique sales lady needs to read the samples before dolling them out.

All by myself...

Jonathan and the kids went to J town for part of the week, so I am flying solo. It's amazing being at home alone, I leave and when I come back the house looks the same! I am not treading water as I do most of the school year, I;m doing things like: all the laundry, scrubbing every floor surface in the house, organizing under my cunters (just felt like leaving that typo because it made me laugh). I went shopping around tonight and I kept thinking that I needed to get back home, but I didn't! It was great! Tomorrow I want to go see Knocked Up and Wednesday I have a date with my friend Julie! We're going to get pedicures and then to eat at Mimi's Cafe. I'm teaching some swimming lessons right now and I learned something about myself. First, when teaching little swimmers I'd rather have the screamers, I guess I like a challenge. Second, being in the water for three hours is HARD! I can't believe how many summers I spent teaching lessons for 4 hours with no break. I also think it was harder because, damn, it was cold. Tomorrow will hopefully bring sun.

Guess what I did today?

Hit a parked car. What a dummy. I mean, how many hundrends of times have I turned left into a parking space? I turned just like I always do and bam, or maybe scrrratch, there was the nice expedition with an injury and poor Myrtle grill is ALL ganked up. The good part is I left my information on the windshield and later the guy called. He was really nice and thankfully all the scratches rubbed right out! Whew! Myrtle's probably won't rub all the way out and now we have to decide whether or not to claim it on insurance. Then I had a headache all day long. But before that we had a GREAT tme at the State Critirium Finals (bicycle) at Will Rodgers Parking lot area. It was lots of fun to see guys riding bikes real fast around a mile long track. I would have taken pictures but I was distracted after the car incident and forgot it.

I was bored...

I was bored while ago and decided to show my "transformation" from no make-up to full make-up. I don't know why all my text is underlined, let me try to fix it.

Better? Yes.




No make up:
What I call the basics, foundation, blush, powder, mascara.
If I have time I usually add eyeliner, a little shadow and I fill in my eyebrows.

Want to play? Maybe you're bored too!

BTW we haven't founf the milk. We're thinking it got thrown away accidentally.

Harry Potter Nerd

At the bottom of my blog you will find something that makes me a total nerd. It's a countdown to the days the 5th HP movie and the last HP book. I'm so excited!

I had a great Mother's Day, we spent the weekend in Abilene and got to spend sometime with the cutest baby born after mine. It was fun to hang out with Robin and Koby and then Sunday with Linda and Granny and Grandad.

Only 7 more school days left! It doesn't seem real yet since the end of the year is always busiest for me with Field Day and all that. I'm showing "the movie" to the 4th graders tomorrow, I hope I survive the boys.

Somewhere in my house...

is an almost full gallon of milk.

This morning I went to make my usual bowl of cereal and the skim milk wasn't there. So I went and asked Jonathan if he had finished it or seen it and he hadn't. So where is it? If I find it I promise to take a picture of it right where I find it. This should be interesting...or gross.

Bowen's 2!

Ugh...

You know a couple of months ago when Mere posted about forgetting to register for the half marathon? Well I have a story that goes along the same line, you now the line of regret and helplessness.

When we started planning Bowen's party we decided to have it at my school. I asked my principal and he said that would be great. He is very cool about all that stuff, he's generous and helpful, I really like and respect him. He met us up at school at 8:30 Saturday morning and let us in. Well we had the party, cleaned up and left. I called him after we left to tell him we were done. Fast forward a couple of hours and I'm hearing my cell phone ring at Ikea. I answer and it's my principal. We left the door to the school open when we left. Oh. Shit. You know that panicky, hot, adrenaline feeling you get when you get a shock, that was me. I never once thought about the door. He kind of gave me a hard time in a half-joking, half-not way and I hung up. Let me tell you guys something, I cannot forgive myself for that. I mean, my personality is one that #1 wants to follow rules and #2 wants people to like and trust me. There is not one thing I can do to fix what we did, I want to make it better SO BAD. I've constructed many apology notes in my head but most of them sound like diarrhea of the mouth. I apologized, and that's all I can do and I hate that. Sorry to post a yuccky story but Blogger won't let me upload pictures of the party so I'll get to the fun stuff when it's fixed. Blech.

Happy Birthday Bowen!

Bowen's second birthday with be forever remembered as "dark". Mostly because our electricity went out last night about 6:30 and wasn't on when I left this morning at 7. We had a pretty bad storm race through with winds about 75 mph. So we have a picture of Bowen by one of the candles we had lit to see stuff like socks and if they match or not. I think Bowen had a good day, I took cupcakes for his friends at school and then he got a haircut. After the haircut we went to Central Market and ate and let the kids play for a while. Bowen's party is on Saturday, I'll post all the pictures then. What I can say most about Bowen's first two years is that he's like a fine wine, he gets better with age. Love ya Bowen!

Heather needs...

I'll do this is countdown style:

6. a childhood
5. 10000 pounds ($) a day
4. some body...guards
3. two therapists
2. Men...NOW
1. NEW BOOBS (oh how true)


I checked out #1 and it's a blog where you can donate money to a girl who wants a boob job...hmmmm.

If you want to play Google your first name and the word needs.

My latest hobby...

Aren't those cute? I've seen those bows on the internet and always thought they were cute but SO expensive. Well, I learned how to make them. On a scale of 1-10 of easiness I would give them a 4. On a scale of 1-10 on labor intensiveness I would give a 7. It is however mindless work and that's nice sitting in front of the TV at night. If you want the instructions tell me and I'll email the instructions to you. Robin, Reegan would be SO cute with one of these on a headband.

Ok, I'm back. I just looked over at Bowen and he was marking on the couch, Jonathan's phone screen and himself with. a. SHARPIE. Aaack.

New Compooter!

We went and bought a new computer and printer tonight, now I don't usually get excited about new technology but...this computer can totally be a T!V! I know, pretty exciting.

You see we're reconfiguring our house and the upstairs room is going to be a playroom (and you hear the angels sing HALLELUJAH) I'm so ready to have the toys all in one place. So we've moved the queen bed to Laine's room and we're putting a daybed upstairs with the toys. That means the desk and computer need to come down so the toys can go up. We have a TV in the kitchen and space would not allow for a TV and computer and desk. So our fancy new computer will now be a computer and TV, eeek!

While I was completing project Bed Move, I was wrestling with the bed frame and part of it totally cheated and hit me while I wasn't looking. Then later that night the kitchen cabinet whacked me a good one on my forehead. I felt like I was two! Today I still have two bumps n my head and they HURT!